Comments on: Making Uncertainty Your Friend http://ourbestversion.com/2008/06/making-uncertainty-your-friend/ Big Picture of Healing and Growth: from Depression to Self Actualization Sat, 04 Feb 2012 18:41:38 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.7 hourly 1 By: Ari Koinuma http://ourbestversion.com/2008/06/making-uncertainty-your-friend/comment-page-1/#comment-2736 Ari Koinuma Tue, 26 Apr 2011 10:34:27 +0000 http://ourbestversion.com/?p=61#comment-2736 Hi Kisha, Thanks, and welcome to OBV! I'm glad you found this post useful. :-) ari Hi Kisha,

Thanks, and welcome to OBV! I’m glad you found this post useful. :-)
ari

]]> By: Kisha http://ourbestversion.com/2008/06/making-uncertainty-your-friend/comment-page-1/#comment-2729 Kisha Mon, 25 Apr 2011 16:43:31 +0000 http://ourbestversion.com/?p=61#comment-2729 Thanks so much for posting this!! I have been having a problem for some time with trying to fight against the grain to make stuff happen in my life; much to my frustration. i now realize that i have been too hung up about the details - everything must be according to plan or its a total failure! Thanks for the post! Continue doing your positive work! Stay bless and inspired!!! Thanks so much for posting this!! I have been having a problem for some time with trying to fight against the grain to make stuff happen in my life; much to my frustration. i now realize that i have been too hung up about the details - everything must be according to plan or its a total failure! Thanks for the post! Continue doing your positive work! Stay bless and inspired!!!

]]> By: Letting Go Of Others; Give The Same Space You Would Want | Look Far - searching for self awareness http://ourbestversion.com/2008/06/making-uncertainty-your-friend/comment-page-1/#comment-1183 Letting Go Of Others; Give The Same Space You Would Want | Look Far - searching for self awareness Tue, 11 Nov 2008 13:42:30 +0000 http://ourbestversion.com/?p=61#comment-1183 [...] we get upset.  This is a silly way to think, but we do it anyways because we don’t like the uncertainty that it [...] [...] we get upset.  This is a silly way to think, but we do it anyways because we don’t like the uncertainty that it [...]

]]> By: Ari Koinuma http://ourbestversion.com/2008/06/making-uncertainty-your-friend/comment-page-1/#comment-420 Ari Koinuma Mon, 08 Sep 2008 14:55:12 +0000 http://ourbestversion.com/?p=61#comment-420 Jennifer, No, I didn't -- really? This is the second time in the last couple weeks someone tells me that my "original" analogies are already taken! ;-) Nah, it must be a proof that great minds think alike. ;-) And no, that was just an example. We had a great weekend. ari Jennifer,

No, I didn’t — really? This is the second time in the last couple weeks someone tells me that my “original” analogies are already taken! ;-)

Nah, it must be a proof that great minds think alike. ;-)
And no, that was just an example. We had a great weekend.

ari

]]> By: Jennifer http://ourbestversion.com/2008/06/making-uncertainty-your-friend/comment-page-1/#comment-418 Jennifer Mon, 08 Sep 2008 04:15:14 +0000 http://ourbestversion.com/?p=61#comment-418 Ari, did you get that example about the flat tire from me? :) I use an example very similar to that when I am teaching people about not setting yourself up for failure. We really have to distinguish between the things we can control and the things we can not. Anything can come up and we have to always be prepared for that - I don't mean at all to live a paranoid life - I think you know that and what I'm saying. BTW - I hope that you didn't get a flat tire over the weekend. Hope it was great! Jennifer's last blog post..<a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/PrinciplesForPeace/~3/383680355/" rel="nofollow">Change Your Life One Thought at a Time - Part 4</a> Ari, did you get that example about the flat tire from me? :) I use an example very similar to that when I am teaching people about not setting yourself up for failure. We really have to distinguish between the things we can control and the things we can not. Anything can come up and we have to always be prepared for that - I don’t mean at all to live a paranoid life - I think you know that and what I’m saying.

BTW - I hope that you didn’t get a flat tire over the weekend. Hope it was great!

Jennifer’s last blog post..Change Your Life One Thought at a Time - Part 4

]]> By: Ari Koinuma http://ourbestversion.com/2008/06/making-uncertainty-your-friend/comment-page-1/#comment-406 Ari Koinuma Sat, 06 Sep 2008 02:02:52 +0000 http://ourbestversion.com/?p=61#comment-406 Hi Jennifer, Well, I think you are correct to think that I stopped making rigid plans because of fear of failure. Or should I say -- I learned my lesson? ;-) But as you can see, I wasn't advocating a vision-free life. I was just trying to isolate the essence of one's vision/objective/goal, and leaving the rest open. I do believe in "begin with end in mind." But sometimes we need to figure out what is really that end we have in mind, and be comfortable with uncertainty as far as what the path to that end may end up being. For example, let's say we plan a family day-trip. We have one coming up this weekend, to go ride a train. Let's say we have a flat tire and miss the train. And that may be disappointing. We may sulk and say "ah! our plan is ruined" and go home empty-handed. Or like you said, we could go "so what? what next?" and go after the TRUE end we have in mind -- which is to have a good time together as a family. The train ride was our planned way to get there, but that one not working out doesn't mean all roads to our end are closed. It's really about flexibility, and trusting in the unknown. ari Hi Jennifer,

Well, I think you are correct to think that I stopped making rigid plans because of fear of failure. Or should I say — I learned my lesson? ;-)

But as you can see, I wasn’t advocating a vision-free life. I was just trying to isolate the essence of one’s vision/objective/goal, and leaving the rest open. I do believe in “begin with end in mind.” But sometimes we need to figure out what is really that end we have in mind, and be comfortable with uncertainty as far as what the path to that end may end up being.

For example, let’s say we plan a family day-trip. We have one coming up this weekend, to go ride a train. Let’s say we have a flat tire and miss the train. And that may be disappointing. We may sulk and say “ah! our plan is ruined” and go home empty-handed. Or like you said, we could go “so what? what next?” and go after the TRUE end we have in mind — which is to have a good time together as a family. The train ride was our planned way to get there, but that one not working out doesn’t mean all roads to our end are closed.

It’s really about flexibility, and trusting in the unknown.

ari

]]> By: Jennifer http://ourbestversion.com/2008/06/making-uncertainty-your-friend/comment-page-1/#comment-403 Jennifer Fri, 05 Sep 2008 19:19:34 +0000 http://ourbestversion.com/?p=61#comment-403 That's really interesting Ari. I do think that different people operate best under different conditions. I kept wondering as I was reading this, is he afraid of failure so he doesn't make definite plans? It seemed that might be that case, but then I don't necessarily think so for you. However, I do think that is why many people don't make plans. I think it's important to have an overall goal that you don't give up on (like you are talking about), set up different options to reach that goal, go with the favorite one, break it down and pursue it. All this time, realize that anything can happen and that is okay. You still have your main goal and other options to pursue and a knowledge of what doesn't work to aid you. I just think it's so important to go into something realizing that anything can happen or come up and that's ok. - "So what? What next?" Saying everything is going to go perfect is only setting yourself up for failure, and not setting yourself up for failure is a lesson that I teach about. I really liked how you brought up about the different options to reach your overall goal. That one makes me think a bit... Jennifer's last blog post..<a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/PrinciplesForPeace/~3/383680355/" rel="nofollow">Change Your Life One Thought at a Time - Part 4</a> That’s really interesting Ari. I do think that different people operate best under different conditions.

I kept wondering as I was reading this, is he afraid of failure so he doesn’t make definite plans? It seemed that might be that case, but then I don’t necessarily think so for you. However, I do think that is why many people don’t make plans.

I think it’s important to have an overall goal that you don’t give up on (like you are talking about), set up different options to reach that goal, go with the favorite one, break it down and pursue it. All this time, realize that anything can happen and that is okay. You still have your main goal and other options to pursue and a knowledge of what doesn’t work to aid you. I just think it’s so important to go into something realizing that anything can happen or come up and that’s ok. - “So what? What next?”

Saying everything is going to go perfect is only setting yourself up for failure, and not setting yourself up for failure is a lesson that I teach about.

I really liked how you brought up about the different options to reach your overall goal. That one makes me think a bit…

Jennifer’s last blog post..Change Your Life One Thought at a Time - Part 4

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