Comments on: 8 Secrets That Help If Your Loved One Suffers from Depression

By: Ari Koinuma

Ari Koinuma — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 22:26:00 +0000

Hi AJ,

Yes, it takes a great deal of patience, but kicking a depressed is not a good idea.

ari

By: AJ Kumar

AJ Kumar — Thu, 26 Feb 2009 16:50:16 +0000

I agree, SNAPPING OUT OF IT never worked for me. You must understand your challenge it and face it/conquer it. AJ Kumar´s last blog post..Blogger Mindset 2.0: Inspire Yourself for Endless Ideas

By: Ari Koinuma

Ari Koinuma — Wed, 29 Oct 2008 02:11:25 +0000

Hi Stacey,

It is a tricky balance. I think it’s better to just ask the person, and someone who’s an expert — because sometimes making that judgment call is quite a burden, too much to handle.

Living with depression is burden enough. We have to lighten up our load!

ari

By: Ari Koinuma

Ari Koinuma — Wed, 29 Oct 2008 01:57:46 +0000

Eric,

It is very useful to know that — otherwise, you can get very hurt. I certainly did, until I realized what was going on. I have heard of relationships that broke up because of depression, and I can see why.

ari

By: Ari Koinuma

Ari Koinuma — Wed, 29 Oct 2008 01:37:37 +0000

Hi Grace,

Thanks. Yes, these were points I wish I’d known when the whole thing started. Some I figured out on my own, others I heard from people ahead of me in the process.

Basics are very important when you’re under strain. Eating, sleeping, and moving your body (it doesn’t have to be rigorous exercise). But yet, they can take quite a hit, like you say — and it compromises our coping mechanisms. It’s very difficult.

ari

By: Stacey / Create a Balance

Stacey / Create a Balance — Wed, 29 Oct 2008 01:34:45 +0000

I’m learning when I should and shouldn’t intervene. It’s hard for me to know when to provide a flashlight and when to sit quietly with my friend and be still with her in the darkness. Stacey / Create a Balance´s last blog post..How Do You Practice the Art of Life Balance?

By: Eric Hamm

Eric Hamm — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 21:02:45 +0000

"Understand that a depressed person is not the person you know." This one is a tough, but essential fact that we need to embrace. Otherwise we will start to resent the person, even when the one we resent is not really them. I really appreciate the thoughtful insights, Ari. Eric. Eric Hamm´s last blog post..When The Right Direction Starts To Look All Wrong

By: Grace

Grace — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 02:43:01 +0000

Excellent post, Ari. We hear a lot about folks who HAVE depression, but not so much from those who live with it through the life of another. Several things I've had to remember: Eating--often too much or not at all. Highly self-critical--they just can't hear the good you try to share with them. Sleeping can be troubled as well, which leads to exhaustion for both parties. Wonderful advice to share, Ari. Really nice work. G. Grace´s last blog post..Being authentic in turbulent times

By: Ari Koinuma

Ari Koinuma — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 02:06:16 +0000

Seamus,

Yes, and I wish I knew that earlier. Hopefully others will take the lesson to heart earlier in the process.

ari

By: Ari Koinuma

Ari Koinuma — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 02:05:34 +0000

Laurie,

I feel your pain — thanks for sharing your story, but wow — that truly sounds like a nightmare. Is this still an on-going, current thing, or is the worst of this behind? I don’t need to know, but I sure hope you’re in a better place now.

Depression is very contagious. It’s gotta be hard for kids not to get depressed when they see their parents struggle with depression. I’m so glad we dealt with our issues before our kids were born.

It is a testament to your strength and faith that you have experienced all that and still able to say “I do forgive him.” I respect that, very much. It tells me a lot about the kind of person you are.

ari